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Before embarking on my study abroad experience, I felt fairly confident in my ability to learn Spanish abroad. I understood that this experience would require me to step out of my comfort zone in certain ways, but I also felt that I had a good enough understanding of the Spanish language that I would be able to get by for five weeks in a foreign country. However, it wasn't until after I landed in Spain and was forced to navigate daily life without being fluent in the native language that I was hit with the realization of just how little Spanish I actually knew. This realization was extremely humbling for me because, for the first time, I was confronted with the reality of what it feels like to not be able to fully communicate my thoughts, feelings, and needs with others. This lack of communication abilities suddenly barred me form a level of intimacy that I took for granted in the U.S. where, for the most part, I can communicate to everyone I know in my native language of English.
Another way in which I underestimated the difficulty of learning a new language was the amount of bravery it took to speak to strangers. I was completely caught off guard by how vulnerable I felt speaking to strangers in Spanish because I had to trust them to be patient and understanding with me while I tried to communicate what I had to say. As the weeks went on, I began to gain more of an understanding of the Spanish language, but even with an increased understanding of the language, I still went though a rollercoaster of emotions when conversing with locals. I think due to the fact that the biggest goal I had set for myself before leaving to study abroad was to improve my Spanish speaking skills, I inflicted an extra layer of pressure on myself to achieve my goal before the end of the program. One recommendation I would make to future students who are interested in doing a language-based study abroad program would be to set reasonable and realistic goals. Don't beat yourself up if you don't manage to achieve the exact goal you had set by the end of the program. Through my experience, sometimes the most important learning happens when you don't limit yourself to a certain goal. Instead, allow yourself to learn from what you've experienced.
Finally, my time in Spain gave me an increased empathy for those who leave their home country to start a new life. I was incredibly lucky to be able to travel and explore Spain due to the opportunities that were given to me, but I'm aware that not everyone has this privilege. In Spain, I gained an entirely new understanding of the meaning behind the word home, and I have a more empathetic understanding for individuals who aren't able to return to their home country for a variety of reasons. Individuals who live in a country other than their homeland are incredibly resilient and hold my utmost respect. I hope that, one day, I might be able to live by their example.
